BusyMamaMD

The first time I saw an obstetrical ultrasound I was a medical student in labor and delivery.  The patient had just found out she was pregnant.  Her last period was about 6 or 7 weeks prior.  I watched the screen as the resident physician moved the ultrasound probe from side to side scanning the uterus.  Then I saw it. Inside the uterus was a sac with a tiny white peanut on the inside.  Zooming in closer I could see the flicker of a tiny heartbeat.  My eyes filled with tears as I looked at this tiny life on the screen.  I knew then I could not perform abortions.   Yet, I do not vilify those that do.  Everyone has a story and everyone has a right to choose.  I am pro-life and pro-choice.

I am pro-life.  I am pro-healthy mom and healthy baby.  In a perfect world, no one would need abortions.  All babies would be healthy.  All mothers would have normal, healthy pregnancies.  Accidents would not happen and birth control would always work.  As an obstetrician, I know nothing could be further from the truth.

I am pro-choice.  Yes, there are women out there that use abortion as a birth control, which I believe to be unethical, but they are the minority.  For most women, abortion is a painful and difficult decision.  Women choose abortion when their baby has a lethal anomaly; when they know he or she will not survive after birth.  Women choose abortion when their baby’s life would be one of pain and suffering secondary to multiple defects.  Women choose abortion if carrying the pregnancy could kill them, making their other children orphans.   Women choose abortion if they are frightened for their life.

“Well, if she was on birth control this would not have happened…”  Guess what?  Birth control is not 100% effective.  Even a tubal ligation is not 100% effective.  Accidents happen even when people are prepared.  I had a patient a couple years ago that was told another pregnancy would kill her after she narrowly survived her first one.  She was responsible and had an intrauterine device (IUD) placed.  A year later, the device failed her and she was pregnant.  She now had a heart wrenching decision.  Does she continue the pregnancy, risking her life?  Does she risk making her husband a single dad and risk leaving her daughter without a mother?  Or does she choose to terminate?  I would hate if the woman was not give this choice and was forced to continue, knowing her life could end.

Life is full of painful choices and decisions are not always black and white.  I have made the choice to not perform abortions, but that does not mean I judge others that do.  I am pro-life and I am pro-choice.   When I am asked my side, my answer is “it depends.”  I wish everyone would step back and listen to the other side for a minute.  Hear the facts, not the false news and propaganda.  Defunding Planned Parenthood and prosecuting abortion providers is not solving anything.  (Furthermore, most Planned Parenthood clinks don’t even offer abortions, but that’s another topic entirely).   In this world of false news and viral social media, it is easy to become swept away with sensational stories and false statistics.  Please remember that things are not always what they seem.  Do not be so quick to judge.  It may be you that has a painful decision to make someday.